Understanding Thought Process

One of the key ingredients of friendship is choice. Its amazing how much control we have in life. The power of perception can build up or tear down relationships. Interpersonal skills seem to be my most difficult issue to address. I try to break things down to the motives and the only true motive I will ever know is my own. I have focused a lot on my Intrapersonal relationships. I like knowing how to work with people. Unfortunately, I often find myself tied up on my words creating difficult situations when I attempt communicating with others. Also, my brain goes way ahead of me. Often I'm told that I think too much. I do. This creates unneccessary worry in my life. My thoughts interupt themselves and my brain goes into overdrive during conversations. I'm thinking about the conversation itself, the person who is speaking with me, anything pertaining to that person and anything outside the conversation that relates to a specific phrase spoken by the other person. Even a mere word can send me off thinking about something that if blurted would seem completely random. Whats worse is how quickly it then jumps from one thing to another. Apparently like I have done in this blog post. Perfect example.

Six Feet Underground

Sometimes id rather be lookin up than down
At this grass beneath my feet

Those words eat
Like maggots crawling and devouring every inch
Digging deeper into the soul

Its not long til its gone
The first sting is all that lasts

Build a wall
You’ll feel safe
In your hate
In your pain

It cant be won
This monstrosity of a game
Its tortuous
Its life

Corroded minds feast on hurting others
But its ok
You tell yourself its ok
Bleeding on the inside
Past the physical
Straight through the mental
Into the emotions
Into the feeling

Tear up
Stand up
Walk right on out
There’s no reason to stay
Except to give way
To more bitter pain
More foolish games

Bittersweet

Brookland-Cayce High School Senior Prom
April 3rd, 2009
South Carolina State Museum
The night consisted of so many surprises and strange events. It was without a doubt one of the most memorable nights of my life. The two most memorable things made it bittersweet: a new friend saw me for everything I never want to be and an old friend really saw me for who I truly am. I lost a friend last night. Not that they died, its more like I'm dead to them. They had recently behaved strangely out of anger and resentment. I hurt them. I don't know how. I don't know what I did but whatever it was cut deep.

With only two months until graduation, time is fleeting fast. I don't know where its gone. Regardless of where and how, it just has. At 7 p.m. I will be at California Dreamin, a fancyish restaurant, with my friends. Dolled up and ready to go to prom, we will sit and reminisce and dream about ahead.

The Truth About Facebook

I just read this article about facebook.com. Whether or not you have an account, with as many people signed onto this site, you may want to check this out. I thought it to be both interesting and eye-opening.

Facebook Article